...that this will be the same color coming out as it was going in. I suppose that's what we get for sticking store-bought baby-food squash with fresh avocado in a food processor.
I swear I saw this same stuff in her diaper (and also my shorts) yesterday.
And now it's all over her face.
And just for the record, I don't think a little girl has ever loved her Daddy as much as this one does.
Linnea turned three months old this week, and as of her weight check at the doctor she still only weighs a whopping 7 lbs. 12 oz. When people see her the first comment is usually,"Oh, look at her! She's a brand new one, isn't she?"
Nope. She's three months old.
When she was first born, at 6 lbs. even, and 5 lbs. 6 oz. when we left the hospital, she was pretty tiny to begin with. I was on a mission to exclusively breastfeed, simply because it was the best thing for her, and at first things seemed to be going pretty well. The doctor said she was "perfect" at her two-week checkup and said that we didn't need to come back until her two-month checkup. I continued breastfeeding and had no idea it wasn't working until we went in at two months, and she only weighed 6 lbs. 5 oz.!
I felt awful. A-W-F-U-L, awful.
Leading up to the arrival of our daughter, we had decided that we were going to keep her on a feeding and sleeping schedule- we had read the first of the Babywise series and it sounded like a good plan for us. We knew some families who followed the Babywise plan and it was working well for them, plus we agreed with the principles presented in the book, so we were going for it. But after Linnea arrived, and we fed her every three hours 24 hours a day for a while (which is pretty typical for every child at first), we noticed that she was pretty fussy, pretty often. My parents insisted that she was hungry, but I insisted on keeping her on a schedule. Turns out they were right. (When is mom ever not right? Someday Linnea's gonna learn that about me. Ha!) I wasn't producing enough milk for her (only about an ounce at a time) but I had no idea because, needless to say, I was ignorant. It's been such a learning process but it's been amazing.
So we started supplementing with formula and she became a much happier baby. Her skinny little legs are filling out and her knees aren't so knobby anymore. She's also pretty much outgrown her newborn clothes- finally. She's much more alert and content- and even though I never wanted to have to give her formula because it's the second-best thing for her and not the best, her health is much more important. While formula is much harder on our wallets, I'm not gonna lie- it's much easier to deal with bottle feeding in public than it is to nurse anywhere outside our home.
On that note, I've pretty much transitioned completely from breastfeeding to formula. I still try to breastfeed her at least once or twice a day, but unfortunately it just isn't working anymore. As a mother, it's surprisingly difficult to have to let go of that ability to nourish your child the way God intended, but on the flip side it's also somewhat of a relief. This motherhood thing can be a crazy ride- no doubt this is only the beginning!
So anyway, here are a few pictures of Cody and Linnea last weekend.
Burps:
Try and resist me:
Look at my loooooong eyelashes like my Daddy's:
Linnea loves Daddy! He's the best.
I am now on day number three of what I have dubbed "inconsolable afternoons." Clean diaper? Check. Full tummy? Check. Burped? Check. Won't burp? OK. Mylecon? Check. Comfortable? Don't see any pinchy diapers... Check. Rocking in her boppy doesn't work, binkies don't work, holding her and rubbing her back doesn't work, singing lullabies doesn't work (although my singing voice may just exacerbate the problem...).
Only two things have changed this week that are completely new to her since she was born. Number one is that Cody returned to work on Wednesday. So is this in any way connected to my husband's absence after being here consistently over the first six weeks of Linnea's life? I'm gonna say no, mostly because I'd like to think I'm enough to console her, but I may be in denial because she is already so clearly a Daddy's Girl. All he has to do is hold her and speak gently in her ear and she is GOLDEN. Sometimes when I pick her up she screams even louder... unless, of course, I'm feeding her. Then it's the epitome of peaceful in this household.
See? Screaming when Mom holds her:
Happy as a clam when Daddy holds her:
And I will spare you a picture of me feeding her. But trust me, she's perfectly fine when I do.
Anyway, RULING THAT OUT, that leaves me with a solid theory as to why she's so upset in the afternoons, because I just don't think these are so-called "daily fussy times." This is knock-down, drag-out, top-of-the-lungs screaming as soon as she is done eating that has lasted almost until her next scheduled feeding. With no daytime naps. And it is COMPLETELY my fault. The theory?
Coffee.
I started drinking caffeinated coffee again. Not a gallon at a time, but a cup or two in the mornings. And after drinking strictly decaf when I was pregnant, this may have been a bit of a shock to her tiny system. Consequently I have a very unhappy infant who doesn't sleep longer than 15 minutes at a time between feedings and crashes at night. (But hey, at least she sleeps at night!) No wonder she doesn't like me. Ha!
Anyway, we'll see if my theory is correct now that I'm giving up the stuff... again. God forbid we have a colicky baby- I would feel so bad for her because I imagine that is miserable! We'll just keep our fingers crossed for more times like these:
Mommy loves you from Andrea Alley on Vimeo.
Daddy's girl from Andrea Alley on Vimeo.
I think I've mentioned before that I never thought I would be the "Pink Mom," but it's safe to say that I threw that thought out the window when I found out I was having a little girl. Pink is now my favorite, favorite color ever, and I find all kinds of inspiration in its many shades. Here's a cute video of her cooing in her crib I shot yesterday- Cody and I love when she is awake and alert and not fussy- it's the best.
Pink crib from Andrea Alley on Vimeo.
When we first started planning the nursery, we had originally intended to paint the walls in a super pale shade of pink, but we nixed that idea the closer we got to her due date. I narrowed down the color scheme to pale pink, ivory, and black, with natural wood furniture and a vintage bird theme. I also wanted to incorporate as many handmade items as possible, made by myself or anyone else who was so inclined. Cody's mom and my parents were also huge contributors to her nursery! Here are some pictures of the finished product:
This is what you see when you walk in the door.
I made the mobile and the flags hanging on her crib and painted the giant "L" gold for the shelves. On the shelves are some pictures from our maternity shoot and my childhood prayer plaque that I always had hanging above my bed when I was little. It says, "Jesus, guide me through the night, wake me with the morning light." We may add some more photos from our birth shoot and newborn shoot as well. My best friend Amber made the birdhouses on the book shelf and my Hummel music box is sitting on top- I always used to fall asleep to it as a child. My Amma's dear friend from Centralia made the blanket hanging on the rack in the corner, and our friend Adria made the pillow in the corner of the crib. We found a night stand at Savers for $8 that Cody refinished and adorned with hardware from my favorite store ever, Anthropologie. We even have my dad's newborn shoes sitting on the bottom shelf :) I love all the handmade touches and keepsakes that went into our little girl's nursery!
Below is a night time shot.
View from glider. Cody refinished and antiqued my childhood dresser for Linnea's room! He did a great job :)
One of my favorite details- the vintage bird hardware Cody surprised me with from Anthropologie for the top drawer of the dresser.
Another wonderful detail is this chalk board Cody made. We found the frame at Goodwill for $3 and bought a board and some chalk board paint and voila! Homemade chalk board!
The glider and changing table. My Amma gave Linnea the beautiful mirror, and the quilt hanging on the back of the glider was made by my great aunt Inga in Iceland. I made the pillow and the pictures on the wall with the help of Cody, who sanded and painted the frames black (he's such a rock star).
Another night time shot.
And of course, how could I leave out pictures of the nursery's precious occupant?
Our dear friend Katie made the green bird rattle laying next to her- so adorable!
"Since the day they got married
He'd been praying for a little baby boy
Someone he could take fishing
Throw the football and be his pride and joy
He could already see him holding that trophy
Taking his team to state
But when the nurse came in with a little pink blanket
All those big dreams changed
And now, he's wrapped around her finger
She's the center of his whole world
And his heart belongs to that sweet little, beautiful, wonderful, perfect
All-American girl."
All-American Girl, Carrie Underwood
Today was the biggest day yet in our journey toward parenthood. This morning, at our ultrasound at 9:30, we learned that Baby is a GIRL! I cannot begin to explain the change this news has made in my heart as we anticipate the arrival of our little one. Seeing her little face for the first time, hearing the ultrasound technician say that she appears healthy and growing at the right pace, pointing out her brain and her organs and her tiny little hands and feet and watching her kick her legs was the most awe-inspiring, breathtaking thing I've ever seen. Perhaps it was the pregnancy hormones kicking into gear (OK, I fully intend to blame it on that), but I was such a happy, weepy mess the whole time as I took in the life that's taking shape in my belly. I was changed forever, through and through.
I had a feeling for a while now that our baby is a girl, although my pregnancy didn't start out that way. For much of the first trimester I was pretty intent on the idea that we were having a boy. There was no rhyme or reason to this whatsoever, it was just my thought process at the time. But as things progressed, I started gravitating toward female names, the color pink, and the idea of making adorable, frilly things for a darling, imaginative daughter, and a life of watching her grow and learn new things every day, and the idea stuck like glue. I actually began to think that if I learned we were expecting a boy, there would be a little twinge of disappointment. I always scolded myself for thinking such ridiculous thoughts, since the most important thing would be having a healthy child, and loving him or her no matter what kind of news comes out of that ultrasound.
And then, when I woke up this morning, my mind was flooded with thoughts of a life with a girl, and life with a boy, and the realization that I had absolutely no preference of one over the over. I was completely at peace with the possibility of either outcome, and when the ultrasound technician said, "Oh! There it is... are you guys ready?" I was totally unbiased, and completely ready for whatever she had to say. And when the news came that we are having a girl, I squealed with delight and cried very happy tears, and knew with all my heart that I would have felt exactly the same way had she said, "It's a boy!"
Without a doubt, a switch was flipped, and my life was changed forever. I was flooded with such a sense of connectedness and love and bliss that I couldn't stop smiling all day. We are one step closer to knowing this person- our daughter!- and raising her to be the best version of herself. Cody and I do not want a spoiled princess, and have all the intentions in the world to keep her from becoming one. I have all kinds of ideas and hopes and dreams for who she will become, but the truth is, I have no control over that- only influence. She already is who she is, and all we can do is our best to raise her in a home full of love, joy, and encouragement; to set positive examples of what it is to be a woman, and how a man should take care of his family, and set the standard for the men that will inevitably enter her life someday; to keep her healthy; to point her toward the God that Cody and I know and love and pray that she finds Him too. She is our little gift, our little girl, and nothing could have prepared me for the joy that I have found in getting to be her mom.
I'm a newbie at this whole mom thing. Follow my mishaps and adventures here.
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